SEXUAL VIOLENCE
Facts about sexual violence:

• Sexual violence is not the victim's fault.
• Sexual assault is an act of violence, not sexual passion.
• Assailants are usually acquainted with the victims.
• Victims can be young or old, female or male.
• Sexual assault occurs because someone perpetrates an act of violence against another person.
  
  If you are sexually assaulted:

• Go to a safe place. Advocates are available to accompany you to the hospital, police or sheriff.
• To preserve evidence: do not shower or bathe, do not change clothes, or straighten the scene of the assault.
• Seek medical attention as soon as possible.
• Try to remember as much as possible about the assailant (physical description, what he said, what he did and what he did) and the assault.
• Don’t try to forget your assault. Find someone to talk to.

You have the right to:

• Receive financial assistance for emergency medical treatment following a sexual assault.

Receive free and confidential services at AVENUES no matter how long ago the assault occurred or whether you reported it to law enforcement.

• Decide whether or not to make a statement to police.
• Be treated fairly and with respect.
• Know the status of your case.
• Be notified if charges are filed.
• Be informed if your abuser is released on bail.
• Be notified and to be present for hearings.
• Be notified prior to plea agreements.
  
  
  

Thoughts on prevention:
While it is important to understand that sexual assault is never the victim's fault, it can be empowering to take steps to reduce one's vulnerability. The following are some tips to protect yourself:

• Remember that people who commit sexual assault are usually acquainted with the victim.
• Be alert to people who do not respect who you are, who talk over you, who always invade your personal space or who show anger or hostility toward your gender, race, sexual orientation, or ethnic origin.

• Do not be afraid to say "No" to people or situations that make you uncomfortable.

• Make sure all doors and windows in your home locked securely.
• Check ID of service and sales people.
• Walk confidently, at a steady pace on the side of the street facing traffic. Stay close to the curb and avoid doorways, bushes and alleys.
• Stay in well-lighted areas and be alert to your surroundings.
• Wear clothes and shoes that give you freedom of movement.
• Have keys ready for house or car. Carry them between your fingers in a closed fist.
• If you are being followed, drive to the police, fire or gas station. Honk your horn.
• Before entering your car, check the interior.

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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Facts about domestic violence and battering:
Domestic violence is an act of power and control vour another person and can include any or all of the following:

• Slapping, punching, hitting, name-calling.
• Controlling your movements and contact With friends and family.
• Forcing you to have sex with him, through throat, use of violence or through coercion.
• Monitoring your phone calls and access to friends and family.
  Red flags to consider:
  -Did he grow up in a violent family?
  -Does he tend to use force or violence to "salvo" his
  problems?
  -Does he abuse alcohol or other drugs?

• Does he have strong ideas about what a J11an should be and

what a woman should be?
If you are being battered, you don't have to take it!
If you need shelter, call AVENUES!
Make plans! Be prepared to leave quickly.

• You may request a police stand-by or escort while you leave.
• Make a plan for how and where you will escape
• Put aside emergency money as you can.
• Hide an extra set of car keys.
• Pack an extra set of clothes for yourself and your children.

Store them at a trusted friend's or neighbor's house. Try to avoid using next-door neighbors, close family members, or mutual friends.

• Take important phone numbers of friends, relatives, doctors, schools, etc. as well as other important items; driver's license, needed medication, credit cards held in your name or Jointly (or at least a list), pay stubs, checkbooks, information about bank accounts and other assets.

Are you in an abusive relationship? Does your partner:

• Embarrass or makes fun of you in front of your

friends or family?

• Put down your accomplishments or goals?
• Make you feel like you are unable to make decisions?
• Use intimidation or threats to gain compliance?
• Tell you that you are nothing without them?
• Treat you roughly (grab, push, pinch, shove or hit you)?
• Call you several times a night or show up to make sure you are where you said you would be?
• Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for saying hurtful things or abusing you?

• Blame you for how they feel or act?
• Pressure you sexually for things you aren't ready for?
• Make you feel like there is no way out of the relationship?
• Prevent you from doing things you want, such as spend­ing time with friends or family?
• Try to keep you from leaving after a fight or leave you somewhere after a fight to "teach you a lesson?"

Do you:

• Sometimes feel scared of how your partner will act?
• Constantly make excuses to other people for your behavior?
• Believe that you can help your partner change if only you change something about yourself?
• Try not to do anything that would cause conflict or make your partner angry?
• Feel like no matter what you do, your partner is never happy with you?
• Always do what your partner wants you to do instead of what you want?
• Stay with your partner because you are afraid of what your partner would do if you broke up?

if any of these things are happening in your relationship, talk to someone. Without some help, the abuse will continue.

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STALKING

• If you suspect or believe that you are being stalked, you should write down or somehow document ALL contacts and incidents.
• Make a plan to escape should you be confronted by the stalker. See the section on "Domestic Violence,"

• Consider making a report to law enforcement. Stalking is illegal and the stalker can be arrested if there is enough evidence.

ORDERS OF PROTECTION
" your partner or family member is threatening or being violent. you can obtain an Ex Parte Order of Protection which orders the abuser to stay away from you.

• You should have information (birthday, social security number) on the batterer if at all possible.
• Ex Parte Orders of Protection will not cost you any money.

SEXUAL HARASSMENT
Sexual harassment at work or at school covers a wide range of behaviors including:

• Sexually suggestive comments
• Jokes of a sexual nature
• Behavior that: relates to your gender or sexuality
  - is intentional and/or repeated
  - is unwanted and not returned
  - interferes with your ability to do your job
  - has an effect on your working conditions
  
  Sexual harassment is illegal. If you are being harassed:

• Tell the harasser that their behavior is sexual harassment.
• Tell someone what is happening to you.
• Consider filing a law suit if the harassment doesn't stop.